The Real Demon Lord Samael
by Yamatano
Summary: Its a parody of "The Real Slim Shady." Its been rated for Samael's foul mouth and use of the 13 bad words


The Real Demon Lord Samael 

A/N: This is a parody of Eminem's "The Real Slim Shady". 

****** 

May I have your attention please? 

May I have your attention please? 

Will the real Demon Lord Samael please stand up? 

I repeat, will the real Demon Lord Samael please stand up? 

Dahlia's gonna have a real problem here. 

You all at like you've never seen a demon before 

Corpses all fall on the floor, like Heather, like James just burst through the door. 

And started whooping Eddie's ass worst than before. 

He first was shot, threw him over Pyramid Head (Pyramid Head screams) 

It's the return of the "Ah crap.....Harry didn't say what I think he just said, did he." 

And Cybil said.....nothing you idiots! 

Cybil's dead now she locked up in the asylum (Nelson's voice: Ha Ha) 

Insane cults love the demon lord Samael. 

"Samael, I'm sick of him. 

destroying people with his you know what

And burning the you know who." 

Dahila: "Yeah, but he's so cute though" 

Yeah, I probably got some screws in my head loose 

But no worse than what's going on in Silent Hill 

Sometimes, I wanna get to Toluca prison and let loose, but can't 

But Alessa tells me to go hump a dead moose 

"I just killed Dahlia, I just killed Dahlia." 

And if I'm lucky, we just might get some medkits. 

And that's the message we deliver to the demon kids 

And expect them not to know how what a sewer bear is 

Of course they're gonna know what Silent Hill is 

By the time they reach Midwich school 

They got the Playstation, don't they? 

"We ain't nothing but monsters" Well, some of us are Lobsters 

Who cut other protagonists like cantaloupes 

But if Alessa keeps telling me to hump mooses and antelopes 

There's a good reason for Lisa to be on that dope 

But if you feel like it, I got the antidote 

Possessed Nurses, wave your lead pipes in the air, sing the chorus as it goes. 

Chorus: Hail Samael (x2) 

Yes, I'm the demon lord Samael, yes, I'm the real Samael 

All you other demon lords are just imitating 

So won't the real demon Lord Samael please stand up,

please stand up, please stand up? 

(repeat) 

Amodeus doesn't have to cuss at his creations to get them to follow his orders. 

Well, I do. So fuck him and fuck you too! 

You think I give a damn about a great knife 

None of you humans can stomach me, let alone stand me! 

"But Samael, if you got a great knife, wouldn't be weird?" 

Why, so you can just lie to get me here? 

So Pyramid Head's brothers can kill Maria with a giant spear? 

Shit, Cheryl better switch me chairs! 

so I can hear Douglas and Harry 

argue about what happened to Mary 

You little bitch, put me on the blast of Silent Hill 

"He is cute, but I think he just told somebody to swallow a pill." 

I should download Heather's audio on MP3 

and show the whole world how you gave Samael VD. 

I'm sick of you little devil and angel worshipping cults, all you do is annoy me! 

So I've been created to destroy you 

And there's a million of demons just like me 

Who fight like me; just don't give a fuck like me 

Who look like me; talk, walk, and act like me. 

and just might be the next best thing, but not quite me. 

(chorus x2) 

I'm like a death wish to listen to, cause I'm only giving you 

Things you should joke about with your friends in the prison room 

The only difference is that I got the balls to say it 

in front of ya'll, I don't got to be sugar coated at all 

I just get on the mic and spit it 

And whether you like to admit it, I just shit it 

better than ninety percent of you demons out there can 

Then you wonder how can demon apes eat up flesh like valiums 

It's funny; because at the rate I'm goin' when I'm thirty 

I'll be the only person in Silent Hill 4 flirtin' 

Pinching Maria's ass and jerkin' with Angela 

And I'm jerkin' but this whole bag of viagra isn't working 

And every single person is a Samael lurkin' 

He could be at Pete's bowling alley, spitting on Eddie's pizza 

Or he could be in the plaza, flying 

And screamin' "HARRY MASON MUST DIE!!!" 

with his flames burning and his horns up 

So won't the real Demon Lord Samael please stand up? 

And put one of those fingers on each claw up? 

And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control 

and one more time, loud has you can, how does it go? 

(Chorus x2) 

Samael: Ha ha, guess there's a Samael inside all of us. 

Fuck it! Let's all stand up. 


End file.
